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Self Help: How to Ooze Charisma (part 1)
In the self-help article "How to Make Yourself
Irresistible to Anyone," I explained the "circle theory" of
relationships. Take out a piece of paper and draw a circle in it. Then, put the initials of the person you're seeking appreciation from in the middle of the circle. Now, put your own initials outside the circle.
Here's how the circle works.
Whenever you are INSIDE another person's circle, this person has trouble connecting with his/her respect, admiration, or love for you. In the extreme, he/she may even develop contempt for you. Whenever you are outside the circle, he appreciates you. He is respectful, attentive and considerate. He goes out of his way to listen to you. The key to making yourself irresistible to someone is to stay outside his or her circle.
When you are skilled at staying outside the circle of others, you will ooze charisma. People will crave your presence. The first way to ooze charisma is to CONTROL your need to talk. We all want to be someone; we all want to feel special. These feelings are natural, but they are also the prime motivation for over-talking.
We talk too much when we are seeking attention, trying to be cool, seeking approval and acceptance, trying to impress, and seeking praise and respect.
Subconsciously, we are trying to gain energy from other people. This is why it is so tempting to
over-talk and why others avoid us when we do. (Visualize Agent 007, James Bond for a moment. Can you imagine him
over-talking?).
If you avoid over-talking, you will stay 'outside
the circle' and maximize your personal charisma.
Your friend,
Lisa B.
[ Part 1 | Part 2 ]
Advanced Self Help Institute
#106, 527 - 15 Ave SW
Calgary, Alberta T2R 1R5
Phone: (403) 261-2726
Fax: (403) 261-2725
Email: info@lisabrown.ca |
